We’re giving away bacon to clients who order commercial appraisals during the month of September. For real.
Aside from being a shameless marketing ploy, it’s simple, really.
Bacon makes people happy.
Everyone wins under this scenario. We get business. You get bacon.
We’re happy. You’re happy.
We’re not sure how or why, but bacon has a universal, almost mystical appeal. Some people consider eating bacon to be a spiritual experience.
Want to make new friends or impress your boss? Give them bacon.
Want to marry a woman?
Give. Her. Bacon.
I think I speak for every member of our team when I say that we love bacon. We really, really love bacon.
The delightful aroma and delicious flavor of these heavenly strips of salted pork are unrivaled in the history of human civilization.
Even the sound, sizzling in a pan, can send our salivary glands into Pavlovian overdrive. Rich or poor, young or old, people simply can’t get enough bacon.
Case in point.
To this day, I have a similar reaction when my wife serves me bacon, especially when accompanied by fried eggs and biscuits.
A Few Facts (Internet Rumors) About Bacon
Since we’re giving it away, we thought you’d like to know a few ‘facts’ we gathered on the internet about our favorite pork product.
- 43% of people prefer bacon to sex. (Wow. Seriously?)
- Bacon doesn’t necessarily come from the belly of the pig.
- Bacon was invented by the Chinese around 1500 BC.
- 65% of Americans would support bacon as our national food.
- Canadian bacon isn’t really bacon. It’s smoked pork loin.
- There has been bacon-scented cologne and bacon flavored toothpaste.
How to Get your Free Bacon
I know this offer sounds too good to be true. You might be thinking “What’s the hitch? Nobody gives away free bacon. What hoops will they force me to jump through?” True enough, simply ordering a commercial appraisal during the month of September isn’t good enough to lay claim to your free bacon. There’s a secret code. Just enter the code phrase “I Love Bacon” anywhere on your order. We’ll also need to know where to ship it. We’ll take it from there.
*We are sensitive to those who don’t consume pork products and willing to accommodate with substitute meat products. Just let us know.